Monday, May 11, 2009

The Last Time

I want to ask you a question that I've been wrestling with over the past couple of weeks.  It seems that in the busyness of life at home, it's easy to ignore, not think about, actually forget about this.  But in the quiet loneliness of a hotel room, it screams at me.  In the absence of children's laughter mixed with the frustration of defiance and disobedience, in the absence of the constant nagging of email and ringing of phones, in the absence of being tied to such a strict schedule of daily chores and carpool lines, God's quiet voice speaks.

How aware are you of God's constant presence in your life?  How often do you speak to Him?  Really?  We know He's in our heart, but how much does He control our lives?  When was the last time you really talked to Him?  I don't mean the last time you asked Him for something.  I mean when was the last time you communed with Him with no other agenda save to get to know Him?  When was the last time you sat in still quietness to do nothing other than listen to His voice?  

It takes a while to clear our minds of all our "to do's".  We drift easily into day-dreaming and have to refocus ourselves onto the task at hand.  It's like talking to our spouses in some ways.  Our minds so easily drift onto tangential highways that it takes effort sometimes to focus on what it is that is really being communicated. It usually takes me a few minutes to stop thinking about my to do's, Tara, the kids, my dreams, my hurts, my embarrassments, my deadlines......and just, well, just quietly sit there and listen, and pray, and not ask for anything other than His Spirit to fill my life, His presence to take over my soul, His word to overwhelm my entire being.

It's not easy to find the time - or the will.

When was the last time?

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